Cheaper to Reaper Page 6

  I nod, knowing my cheeks are flaming. It’s kind of embarrassing to admit this stuff, honestly.

  He snorts then. “I have noticed a fair bit of those on the lasses’ nightstands in my travels to the other facet.”

  I wonder what that means. Like, has he gone to collect the soul of some poor girl who had a heart attack over a steamy love scene in some hot laird-lady romance? Or did she maybe get electrocuted by some faulty battery-operated boyfriend?

  Death by B.O.B. How embarrassing would that be?

  I cock my eyebrow at him again. “So, you’re like a ‘twatcher’?” He gives me a look like he didn’t quite understand that.

  “A Peeping Tom?” Blank stare.

  “Snoop? Voyeur?” That gets me a scowl. Whatev. I’m going to call it like I see it.

  Samuel gets a look on his face that any monarch would be proud of. He twists in his seat so he’s facing me more fully.

  “To answer yer daft query, no. I complete my assignments proper like. But when ye’ve been doin’ this as long as I have, lass, ye’ll be lookin’ to get yer entertainment where ye can too.”

  I grin. His accent is thicker now that he’s upset and it’s so adorable. I open my mouth to tell him that, but the vehicle thingy we’re in starts to slow. Samuel looks up like he’s startled.

  “We’re here already,” he says, like he’s surprised. It makes me feel kind of good that maybe he was enjoying my company so much that he didn’t even notice the passing scenery. Or the time.

  Time. Seems like I have an awful lot of it ahead of me. If what Samuel says is true about “finding entertainment” where I can, I figure I’m probably going to have to make my own. I’m easily bored, that’s for sure.

  One thing that’s really bothering me, though, is the fact that Samuel has already served most of his sentence. I mean, he probably has like another fifty years, but I’m looking at nearly three hundred ahead of me. When I jumped at the chance to be a Reaper, it was only because I was thinking of a future with the guy. A guy I had just met. And one I wasn’t even sure wanted me in the same way.

  Yeah, I’m super impulsive.

  I sigh as the vehicle thing parks itself. There are several dozen of the gray vehicles in the parking lot and I think about the fact that I could just jump in one whenever I want and take off. If I knew how to operate it, that is.

  We’re both quiet as we take in the sprawling campus before us. It’s freaking huge. The buildings all look like they were dropped here from the Middle Ages. All the ones I can see are made of rocks and the larger buildings look like freaking castles.

  There have to be a thousand people walking all over the green grass and paved walkways that wind between immense trees that tower over even the tallest building. It looks like a lot of college campuses I’ve seen in movies, honestly.

  I notice then that a lot of the females are wearing normal clothes and not a stupid uniform.

  “Why do I have to wear this ridiculous and very ugly uniform?” I ask Samuel as I point to a girl wearing a halter tank and a metallic miniskirt, showcasing extremely long legs. I hate her instantly. Well, not really, but you know… It’s totally unfair that I have to wear such an ugly uniform.

  He rolls his eyes. “The Afterlife Academy is made up of twenty different schools. Some of the schools have uniforms, some don’t. And some of the outfits you see are actually the uniforms. That girl—” he points to the one I just indicated, “—is wearing the uniform for the Bi School.” I raise both brows at that and he laughs.

  “Incubi and Succubi School,” he explains.

  She’s a succubus? For reals? It figures, since she’s smoking hot and dressed like a hooker. Succubi are even worse than sirens. They lure men to the death with sex, I think. I wonder what their real purpose is in the afterlife. It seems most of the “fairytale” figures I’d learned about in the old life have a real and useful purpose in the afterlife.

  It also makes me wonder exactly what the “bi’s” learn in school.

  “Why do some of the, uh, services have schools, but the others don’t?” I ask. It’s all kind of confusing, to be honest.

  He glances out at the students going by. “There’s some sort of training for everyone, but some of the services are much more training intensive,” he says, sounding like an employment recruiter.

  “Like the Reapers,” he adds with no pride in his voice, which is kind of surprising. In fact, he seems sort of resigned, I guess, to being a Reaper.

  “Your friends will be getting some training from Meekla, the head siren, but there isn’t much to learn about screeching boats away from rocks,” he jokes. I laugh and think that the girls should excel at that.

  “How long is the school?”

  Samuel shrugs. “It depends on how fast you learn, but at least a year.”

  “Great, a whole year stuck wearing this damned uniform,” I grumble as I finger the hem of the plaid skirt.

  “Speaking of uniforms,” Samuel says with a bit of a smirk, “as much as I enjoy seeing all that skin, you need to fix it so you’re dressed properly. And yes, even the shoes,” he says before I can argue.

  I huff. “It’s so damned ugly, though. Especially the shoes.”

  His lips quirk. “Thank you. I picked it out myself.”

  “Seriously?” I ask with widened eyes. “Are you stuck in the seventeen hundreds or something?”

  He laughs and waves his hand to indicate my outfit. “Lass, if that were an outfit from my time, it would reach the floor and take up most of the front area of this transport. The ladies’ gowns back then were… cumbersome.”

  Okay, well yeah, he’s right, but still. I huff as I untie the blouse from under my boobs. Samuel pushes a button on the dashboard and the windows instantly darken. It’s suddenly cozy in the transport. My eyes travel to Samuel’s mouth then, zeroing in on his plump, dusky lips.

  Perfect for a kiss…

  I shake my head and glance at him to see if he caught me staring at his mouth. Nope, his eyes are focused on my hands, where they’re holding my blouse. I haven’t started buttoning it yet and I have the insane desire to unbutton it the rest of the way.

  It feels like someone just cranked the heat up a notch inside the transport.

  The moment is shattered when he seems to realize he’s staring and he shakes his head. Clearing his throat, he looks out the windshield again.

  “When we get out of the transport, we need to maintain the student-teacher persona. I can’t have you… being, ehm, well…” he glances back at me and I rise to my knees in the seat, facing him so I can tuck in my blouse. Of course, I unzip my skirt to do so and let it slide down my hips a little.

  And now I’m channeling Tabby.

  Samuel’s eyes widen as his eyes glue to my movements. I really don’t know how to do sexy. To be honest, I’ve never even had a real boyfriend, mostly thanks to Tabby making it her life’s mission to distract any guy who set his eyes on me.

  And yeah, pathetic as it is, I died a virgin.

  He swallows then and clears his throat again as he forces himself to look away again.

  “That’s what I’m talking about!” he huffs, angrily. “You can’t be doing things like that!”

  “Things like what?” I ask, making sure I sound like innocence personified. “I’m just doing what you asked, fixing my uniform and all. Wouldn’t want the teacher to take a ruler to my backside.”

  Okay, I might have overdone it with that breathless last part. Samuel side-eyes me, looking like he’s more than a little suspicious. I give him wide eyes, then move my hands to my boobs. Well, to the buttons at my cleavage anyway. I slowly button the blouse up to the neck as his eyes follow the movement, like he can’t help himself.

  Once the top button is done, I undo the tie around my neck and wrap it around the blouse’s collar like it’s supposed to be worn. I lean forward then, “accidentally” putting my hand on Samuel’s thigh… you know, for balance.

  Inwardly, I’m grinning
like an idiot.

  “Can you help me? Since I don’t have a mirror, I can’t see to tie it.” Total lie; any girl can tie a bow without a mirror, even one on their back while hanging upside down blindfolded. We gotta be talented, what with all the complicated fashions we wear.

  A slight frown creases his brow, but he reaches for it anyway. I notice his hands are shaking slightly. It takes him several tries, but he finally gets it. I thank him and then bend to get the shoes from the back seat, making sure my butt is in the air for way longer than necessary.

  I hear a slight groan. I smirk; it’s kinda obvious the attraction isn’t one-sided, thankfully. Just gotta figure out how I’m gonna get him to let his guard down. I think the teacher needs to give this student private lessons.

  Heehee.

  I grab the fugly shoes and then wiggle — exaggerating it, of course — back to the front and I sit. I don’t even glance at Samuel, like I’m all intent on what I’m doing. I bend the leg closest to him and take my time unbuckling my gorgeous platform. The movement causes the skirt to hike further up on my legs and of course I don’t pull it back down.

  After I get it tied, I put my foot down and raise my other leg. My skirt moves even higher and I am pretty sure Samuel is getting a good look at my amethyst lace panties. Thank gawd I got to keep my lingerie; I can only imagine what ugly granny panties would have gone with this uniform.

  “I’ll be… uh, right outside,” he barks and he fumbles for the door handle, then gets out, slamming the door behind him.

  Hopefully, he doesn’t hear my slightly evil chuckle afterwards.

  Chapter 6

  A FTERLIFE ACADEMY IS an immense place. I mean, freaking huge. I thought it was big when we first pulled up, but our view from the parking lot had just been the short side of the place. It’s like acres wide and miles long.

  I know that I’m going to get lost.

  It wouldn’t be the first time. I sort of have a knack for getting lost. One time the girls and I took a day trip to go to the mall in Houston and I got lost in one of the department stores. When I couldn’t find the girls, I’d had somewhat of a breakdown. It was horrible. They had to call security and everything.

  After that, Tabby swore they were going to get me one of those harnesses with the leash that mamas put on their toddlers. Bitch.

  Samuel is leading me down like the bazillionth hallway since we walked in the place. Inside, it looks pretty much like the outside, like a castle, except the inside has more modern amenities than what an old castle would have.

  I’m gawking at… well, everything. All the people really don’t look any different even though they’re dead, and it brings to mind a memory of my old high school. It’s weird the things I can remember, like mostly the stuff I’d like to forget. Like high school, where I walked in the shadow of my besties, who got all the drooling looks from the guys and the eye daggers from the girls.

  Except this time, most of the girls are shooting me snotty looks, probably because I’m walking with the hot teacher I’m sure they’ve all fantasized about.

  I try to rubberneck at my surroundings as much as possible, because I’ve never been inside what I’m pretty sure is really and truly a castle. We’re moving through what looks like a commons area and most of the furnishings look like they could be straight out of a scene from Robin Hood. The stone walls surrounding us are lined with pictures of the principals and their notable co-principals. I want to stop and look at them, but Samuel charges on and I’m forced to jog to keep up with him.

  He hasn’t said more than three words to me since we left the parking lot. I guess he’s flipped the switch to some sort of “authority figure” mode or something.

  We turn down a hallway and pass a room that I see is a cafeteria and I realize that I’m starving again.

  “Samuel,” I call to get his attention. He glances back at me. “Can we get something to eat?” I ask as I trot up beside him. He’s been walking so fast that it’s a real workout to keep up with his long stride.

  He barely glances at me. “No.”

  That’s it. Not a, “I’m sorry, Chloe, we don’t have time. But I’ll be sure and take you out for a steak dinner later, you know, wine and dine you and then see where this attraction leads us.” Nope. All I got was a one-word kiss-my-ass answer.

  And that’s exactly what he can do.

  I narrow my eyes at him. I’m not gonna be so easily dismissed by someone I’m so attracted to, jackass or not. I gotta up my game.

  “Okay,” I say sweetly. “I’ll just see if I can find some other guy to take me later.”

  No response. Not even a glance over his shoulder. Dagnabbit. I would stomp my foot, if I wasn’t jogging at the moment.

  We’ve turned down so many hallways that I’m getting dizzy. Every one of them has been crowded with hundreds of “kids,” and I use that term loosely, because so far I’ve seen people who look like they’re about thirteen all the way up to maybe thirty. I’m assuming most of them are “barely departed” like me, having died within the past few years, since they’re attending the Academy. But then, who knows? Maybe some of the schools at the Academy take fifty years to graduate from.

  I’ve noticed a lot of different uniforms so far, some even uglier than mine. But honestly, mine isn’t that bad… other than the shoes. And I’ll never admit it out loud, but the fugly granny shoes are darned comfortable. I never would have been able to chase after Sammy Swiftfoot through this freaking castle if I’d had on my platforms.

  We turn down yet another freaking hallway — did I say I was getting lost here? Cuz I so am — when I notice a huge guy coming toward us. And by “huge,” I mean, seriously, if he weren’t hunched over, his head would bump the lights hanging from the ceiling. And that’s just his height — his shoulders are wide enough to hold a haybale on each side.

  He’s big, but it looks like all muscle. I bet he tosses train cars for exercise.

  My eyes travel all over him, because for one, I’m a teenage girl and he’s male. And two, us fun-size chicks are usually drawn to the big dudes. I always thought it was some sort of preservation instinct, like pick the biggest guy so he can part the crowds for you so that you don’t get stepped on like a June bug at a picnic.

  That crowd parting thing would come in handy at the mall on Black Friday.

  But when the guy gets close enough that I can get a good look at his face, I almost cringe. The nicest way to describe it is scary-looking. Like spooky movie character scary.

  A shiver runs through me.

  I think he’s Asian, maybe Japanese, but his face is scarred and somewhat distorted. He almost looks like… well, not to be mean, but he looks like a cross between a man and one of those sled dogs. A Husky, I think.

  Apparently, he has a reputation, because I notice that everyone is giving the guy a very wide berth, like maybe his attitude is as bad as his looks.

  Even though he’s still pretty far down the hall from us, I notice something that pulls at the sweet side of me, that side that I usually keep buried thanks to getting hurt: The guy has a sort of lonely look to him. And it’s no wonder; with his looks, I bet everyone runs from him as far and as fast as they can.

  That was my first reaction too.

  But for some reason, I don’t think that he’s bad. Yeah, I know it’s stupid, that I can’t just look at someone and know such things about them. But somehow, I do. Maddie always said I was an empath; maybe that’s enhanced now too.

  I have no idea what school the guy is going to, since he’s wearing what I’m assuming are gym clothes. I make a note to ask Samuel after we pass the guy.

  He draws closer and his eyes flick over to Samuel and he nods in greeting. Samuel returns the nod. But then he looks down at me, so I smile and cock my head to the side in a flirty way. I think the guy could use a friend and I wanna let him know I’m the gal for the job.

  The big guy stumbles a little then and looks shocked that someone paid any attention to him. It break
s my heart, honestly.

  Aww, poor baby…

  I slow for a second, thinking that he’s going to stop and talk to me, but he seems to recover and keeps on walking. I glance back at him, and then back at Samuel.

  “Who was that big guy?”

  Samuel looks over his shoulder, like he has to clarify who I’m talking about, like we didn’t just pass the largest man I’ve ever seen — and I come from a pro-football town.

  Truly, an eye-rolling moment here.

  “Toru.”

  Okayyy… that doesn’t quite answer the question.

  “What is he? I mean, his service.”

  Samuel glares down at me. “He’s… with the shifters. Werewolf.”

  Huh. Well, that explains the face, I guess. Samuel told me before that there were such things as shifters, but it’s just weird to me to think that one could go from human to animal. But I guess it’s not any weirder than anything else I’ve come across so far. I swear, I’m still waiting to wake up.

  “Is that why he sorta looks like a cross between a guy and a dog?”

  Samuel gives me a look I can’t read, but he nods hesitantly, then speeds up to walk ahead of me, like he’s dismissing me. Uh, I don’t THINK so…

  I kick it into fifth gear to catch him. “Then why don’t the others look different? I mean, everyone looks human… uh, normal.” This new body is killer, cuz I’m not even out of breath from chasing his dumb butt all over God’s creation. In my old body, by now I’d be holding my sides, having a coronary as I slid down the wall to pool into a puddle of out-of-shape goo.

  Samuel barely glances at me. He seems really hesitant to discuss this, for some weird reason.

  “While they’re in school, everyone looks human. After completion… well, some have their appearance changed.”

  That doesn’t explain anything, as far as I’m concerned. Pretty sure there’s something he’s not telling me. I mean, why is Toru the only one I’ve seen who’s like half and half? If he’s still in the school, he should look human, according to what Samuel just said. But if he already graduated — and his appearance changed — why is he still at the Academy?